My first love...Or I guess

Anonymous

It all started in tenth grade when I was just 13 and my 14th birthday was yet to come. You were a part of my new class. I remembered you were in my class in 6th as well but I never felt anything back then but when I met you in 9th again, I felt something different... Something I felt for the first time in my life... LOVE. I had to get you to like me... I started talking to you more and trying to be likable. We even spoke together in the school event which was held in like 26 days from my 14th birthday. I loved your company even more from then. I knew from then that it wasn't infatuation like adults say about kids being in love. You felt different. We became best friends. I knew better than anyone in this world. You would come to me and tell me everything when you were sad. I was glad I was helpful but more than that, You made me scared. Scared that I'll lose you, the best I had ever had in my life, by confessing.

But the confession had to be done someday right?? I confessed my feelings to you on June 6th on the phone at 3:45 in the evening, I remember.This was a long time from my birthday... I was already 14 and I was in 10th class.I also remember crying on the phone afraid I lost you, but instead of being mad at me, you consoled me and asked if things could ever be the same. I was glad that things would be back to normal but always wondered how things would have been if we were together.

Well... things were never right anymore. You stopped coming to me, You never texted first like you used to... I missed you but more than that, I hated myself for everything I could remember.

After a few days, You were the one who texted me first. I thought you were finally going to try to mend this broken friendship together but just worsened it by texting the most shocking thing I had ever heard from you... You confessed to me. I was shocked... If I liked you and even you liked me for the longest time, why the hell would you deny me?? I was extremely sad. The whole day after that was pretty silent and I just stared at the walls with my books on my table since the exams were coming. I worst time for a confession.

I had to get answers from you... I couldn't keep it to myself either... A few of my friends got to know and tried giving me relationship advice which just didn't help me at all. We met in the lunch break and you told me everything. You told me that you didn't want to date me because you didn't want me in the middle of your studies... I could never do that. If I were your girlfriend, I would have treated you like a king and I would have helped you to score better or something. I was sure that I would have.

Now, you are in a different class and you are with your new batch of friends who have replaced me and I know I would never lose the love I had for you but I guess you have because I've seen you've moved on but It ain't so easy for me. I an sorry I even confessed to you. I really miss you.