Last love18 Dec, 2012 03:24 PM
It started when I was in senior high. My class consisted only 16 students. I was an introverted, shy girl. Nobody talked to me as I never gave them a chance to get close to me. I was never interested in any kind of relationship. Whenever it gets to a group work, nobody wants me. All I do was to wait if a group lacks member. Even when my classmate made fun of me, I kept quiet. I once told myself that I should no longer be an introverted girl, yet I don't know why I can't.
One day, a new boy called Jack entered my class. He was fat ass, dorky. I believed he would be no different from me. However, he was actually outgoing, nice and smart boy. He was kind to everyone. He praises everybody, even me. He said, "Woah! I'm sitting next to a genius girl!" when he was sitting by my side. I knew I wasn't even that clever, but my English was the best. I don't know why he was getting closer to me. He was crossing the boundaries I drew, getting to me closer and closer. I started to get annoyed when our classmates gossiping about us being together. It hurts my pride, totally. I wanted to shout out that I would never fall for a fat ass, ever!
But I won't deny that since he became acquainted with me quite well, a girl called Mei became closer to me and Jack. The other classmates paid more respect to me too. And we were soon known as the trio of the class. I hate when my classmates took photos of me and Jack together as they would make fun of us. I don't want this pig head Jack! They even edited our photo and made us look like a couple. But I have to admit that I was soon be able to open up myself to him, telling him every single secrets of me.
Entering university, I, Jack and Mei entered the same university, though majoring in different faculties. I was no longer an introverted girl. I believed I was in love with Jack, but I guess I was still too shy to admit that I like an ugly fat ass.
One day, Mei asked me to talk privately with her.
Mei: Umm... Well... Mia, you see... I want to ask you something
Mei: ummm well... Aaah it's embarrassing!
Me: tell me quick!
Mei: um... Do you... By any chance, in love with Jack?
Seriously, I don't even know why I answered "no". I guess it's because I wasn't ready to take the fact that I was in love with a man who wasn't reliable, and the top of that, bad figure. Moreover I was too nervous to digest the words before replying.
Mei: then... Can you guess why I'm asking you this?
This made me insecure. I was too naive to think that Mei was just randomly asking. And my guess was right. Mei likes Jack, just how I like him. She told me how she has been in love with him, how she was glad that I wasn't in love with Jack. In fact, I regretted for not telling the truth. What should I do now? I know that my best friend was in love with my crush, and I lied to her. I don't want to stab Mei from the back, but I could no longer hold on this feelings. I love him, that time, I was sure, I love him. Madly, like there was no tomorrow.
It was a hard decision for me to decide that I'll stay away from Jack, to give Mei a chance. I promised, the next time I meet Jack, I would no longer treat him as I used to. I vowed that I took him only as a brother. However, it was easy said than done. There's no way I could suppress this passion. As a result, I was only getting closer to Jack, as I was afraid that Mei would some day snatch him away for me. Whenever I see jealousy in Mei's eyes, I felt guilty and knew that I mustn't do this. But seeing them together, I felt like dying.
On my 21th birthday, he brought me a bucket of roses, 21 in number. As he knelt down, he said, "Mia. You see, I've been in love with you all this time. I am madly in love with you. You are my everything. I'd do everything for you." I was stuck at his words. It was unexpected. My feet felt heavy, as heavy as the rain outside. I didn't know what to do. Making the matter worse, I realized, standing behind Jack, across me, was Mei, covered in tears. Jack then opened the red box he has been holding, inside was a star joint with a moon shaped ring.
"I... Jack, that was touching. I love you too... I love you more than you think I do...". Before I could proceed further, his lips landed on mine. He sucked my lips as his tongue wondered around my mouth. He used his arms to corner me. I tried to push him, yet to no avail. In the end, I could do nothing but to surrender. Without realizing, I responded to his kiss. When I came to my senses, I pushed him away in one shot. He was shocked, and I added, "I... Think you misunderstood, I only take you as a brother." As I reject him, he no longer talks a lot to me nor Mei. I was feeling guilty as I hurt him, and myself too, but if I didn't, what would become of Mei? Ever since witnessing that kiss, that fateful kiss, Mei never talked to me anymore. I guess she was mad at me. I then decided to work overseas, to forget about Jack. To forget how regretful I was for rejecting my first and only love. I was too stupid to deny my own feeling, only to cause this awkward atmosphere.
2 years later, I returned. Soon, I arranged a meeting with Jack and Mei. I felt nervous, yet excited to see them. Never did I believe that once again, I could sit on the same table with them. I missed this atmosphere so much. "Well... I have something to talk about." Mei said while giving me a bright smile. "Me too. You go first." I replied. I guess this would be the beginning of our rebuilt friendship. A nice and new beginning. "Here." Mei said while handing me over a card, "that's our wedding invitation. It's tomorrow. I'm sorry for only telling you this now. Due to your absence, we couldn't tell you about the news immediately."
I could not believe in what I heard, neither I want to. My sight blurred, i don't want to believe this fact, this cruel fact. I hoped this was only a dream, yet that dream completely vanished when I saw Jack and Mei's name on the card. My tears was soon formed and gathered, yet I held it on, not trying to make myself look more embarrassing. Mei even offered me to be their brides maid. And I agreed to it quickly.
That night, I cried in my bed. I cried till there was no more tears left, no more voice left. I cried for hours. I wish I could turn back in time, or at least stop the time. I don't ever wish that clock would turn 00:00. The next day, in the morning, I was still lying in bed, thinking about how foolish I was to free that love, true love, last love. However, I took the challenge one more time. I put on a gown and came to Jack's house. I saw him in his suit already. He looked handsome, gorgeous in my eyes. For me, it felt like a cinderella's dream to see a living prince right in front of my eyes now. He then returned my stare. That stare I've been missing so much this year, the stare that I've been missing like crazy.
"Jack I know this might be foolish, but I swear to heaven I love you. I love you like there was no tomorrow. I never stopped a day without loving you, I..." before I could finish, he cut me off. "That was sweet, Mia. You reminded me of how foolish I was to confess to you two years ago. But you won't trick me. I'm aware that you take me as a sibling." he said. "no! No! Jack! I'm not playing tricks on you. I swear I love you! You're my first love, I love you whole-heartedly! I can't see you with some other woman."
"Mia... I could no longer differentiate between lie and truth, thus, let me go, despite the truth, if you really love me, I can't hurt Mei for being with you. I won't be so selfish. After all, I have no feelings for you anymore. I'm completely Mei's." He walked away, straight pass me. I knew I was hurting deep inside, yet I gathered my courage and faced Mei. I accompanied her in car, to the church. As soon as we arrived in the church, Mei received a call. And her face went pale afterwards. "Jack, he... He got into an accident. Car accident and currently in hospital!" she said. I fell into despair. These transparent liquid called tears came out from my eyes. I could no loner hold on my tears. I and Mei rushed to the hospital, to the emergency room, only to see Jack covered with a white cloth.He was dead. He instantly passed away right after the accident.
Suddenly, a nurse came into the room to see the whole family who came. "anyone called Mia?"
"me... I'm Mia."
"Here. It was found held tight by the deceased." replied the nurse and she soon went away. She handed over a small box which contained a ring. A familiar ring. In the ring was written "Jack&Mia". It was the exactly same ring as the one he used to confess to Mia two years ago,
Then, I knew, that he hasn't forgotten about me, even once, until now, until he die. He brought that love till the end of his life.