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it's not over yet


14 Sep, 2012 05:05 PM

Everyday I would wake up with a frown. I looked around my surroundings and realized that I am back to reality. When I fall asleep, I feel like I can escape and dream of something beautiful. In reality, I am just another broken person. My father has lowered my confidence and me having hope of doing anything. My mother has a way of making me feel bad by yelling at me.

February 2012, I began to cut. I didn't know what to do I just cut. At times I was having troubles at school and home as well. That month my parents began to push me really hard and that's when I began to go insane. I wanted to die. I thought about suicide and was gonna attempt to kill myself but I didn't do it. I knew that if i killed myself that it would effect my parents a lot and make them feel like they are failures, to be honest they do fail at being a parent. I tired my best to look like i can take a rude comment but inside i am dying slowly. They hurt me a lot not in a phyical way, but emotionally.

March 2012, Everything was even worse but this time it was worse. I found out I had depression. i told my mom about but some how she managed to hide the hurt and just covered it up with anger that I didn't tell her before. At that time I hated my mother. I despise her.

April 2012, both my parents have seperated for many different reasons. My mother didn't love my father anymore. She apologized to me for everything she has done to hurt me, I told her I would forgive her but I will never forget the things she had sad to me. After two week of my parnets separation, My mom lets my father move back into the house. I told her that I will not stay there because i knew he was going to accuse her of something she is not doing. I also told her that I was leaving and won't come back unless he is gone. She made me stayed, She said if I ran away then she would call the cops on me. I stayed.

May 2012, I told her he would do it again. Now he is gone again living in his own apartment. I was happy to say that he was gone but i told my mom again that if he ever comes home again, I would leave no matter what. If she calls the cops on me then I would tell them everything. I know it's harsh and all that but that's when i reached the boiling point.

June 2012, I was having an end of the year party at my place. Then my father shows up drunk telling my mom to take him back. I told him if he doesn't leave then I am most definantlty calling the cops. He left and then tried to come back but left.

Three months later, I haven't seen nor talked to my dad. I didn't want to talk to my dad. Nor his family. When i found out he wanted to commit suicide i just automatic began to cry. His sister came over my place to talk to my mom. I walked out my room and went into the living and then Both her and my mother began to bag on me. I walked to my room pretended that it didn't effect me but it really did. I began to have a meltdown and suddenly i found myself wanting to cut. I stoped and threw the piece of glass against the wall and continued crying.

Present day, Here i am trying to hold back the tears that i am trying so hard not to spill in front of my classmates. I had tried to stay strong not just for me but for my brother and sister. I don't know whats going to happen next but i know that it's not over yet.

Tags: Sad, Depressed
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Sarah says:
17 Sep, 2012 07:34 PM

Hey, thats a sad story :( But try to stay strong. Dont think about suicide. Dont leave ur brother&sister. Plz...

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Kumar Dharnish says:
18 Sep, 2012 09:13 PM

Hey,i read ur's really sad bt never lose hope for life.pls,don't think abt suicide,it's not strong nd face the's real life.

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Gabby says:
25 Sep, 2012 09:39 AM

My Name is Gabby.I will love to share my testimony to all the people in the forum cos i never thought i will have my girlfriend back and she means so much to me..The girl i want to get marry to left me 3 weeks to our weeding for another man..,When i called her she never picked my calls,She deleted me on her facebook and she changed her facebook status from married to Single...when i went to her to her place of work she told her boss she never want to see me..i lost my job as a result of this cos i cant get myself anymore,my life was upside down and everything did not go smooth with my life...I tried all i could to have her back to all did not work out until i met a Man when i Travel to Africa to execute some business have been developing some years back..I told him my problem and all have passed through in getting her back and how i lost my job...he told me he gonna help me...i don't believe that in the first place.but he swore he will help me out and he told me the reason why my girlfriend left me and also told me some hidden secrets.i was amazed when i heard that from him..he said he will cast a spell for me and i will see the results in the next couple of days..then i travel back to US the following day and i called him when i got home and he said he's busy casting those spells and he has bought all the materials needed for the spells,he said am gonna see positive results in the next 2 days that is Thursday...My girlfriend called me at exactly 13:35pm on Thursday and apologies for all she had done ..she said,she never knew what she's doing and her sudden behavior was not intentional and she promised not to do that was like am dreaming when i heard that from her and when we ended the call,i called the man and told him my wife called and he said i haven't seen anything yet... he said i will also get my job back in 3 days time..and when its Sunday,they called me at my place of work that i should resume working on Monday and they gonna compensate me for the time limit have spent at home without working..My life is back into shape,i have my girlfriend back and we are happily married now with kids and i have my job back too.This man is really powerful..if we have up to 20 people like him in the world,the world would have been a better place..he has also helped many of my friends to solve many problems and they are all happy now..Am posting this to the forum for anybody that is interested in meeting the man for can mail him to oluwefash@gmail com or visit www
i cant give out his number cos he told me he don't want to be disturbed by many people across the world..he said his email is okay and he' will replied to any emails asap..hope he helped u out too..good luck

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shorty_01 says:
05 Nov, 2012 10:50 PM

im sorry about mom and dad used to fight all the time.i know how you feel. anytime you wanna talk let me know and i'll give you my email or number so we can text:)

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