I am broken inside......
Felicia Fong10 Apr, 2010 11:46 PM
Well, I am from Malaysia. I moved to Singapore just to get my education. At first, I did not agree with my parents on going to Singapore. However,I finally agreed when my parents said that if I go to Singapore, I will get higher chances to get into a good university(Ya, I am quite young then). Now, I really really regretted coming here.
On my first day of school in Singapore, I felt very lonely. Nobody talks to me. I guess that they don't really want to talk to an international student. But, there is only one guy. Well, ok ok, a VERY cute guy talked to me. He was the first to talk to me although I am an international student. Since that day, my friends increased because of him. He introduced all his friends to me. Life starts to get better because of him.
Every morning, he will call me to say that he will pick me up from my house because he was worried that I might get lost here. We will go to school together. In the afternoon after school, he will wait for me. No matter how long I have to stay back for my additional tuition in school or my CCA, he will wait for me. Usually, my additional tuition or CCA lasts for a few hours. However I wasn't scared that I have to go back home alone. I have him.
After a few months I get to know him, I realized that I have fallen in love with him. I cannot live without seeing him even for a day. During class, I keep thinking of him. During recess, I will think of a way to talk to him or even just walk pass him. Although I was aware that I liked him, I never expressed my feelings towards him. I was very scared that if I tell him, I might never be able to talk to him or see him again.
My "hidden love" plan went quite well until one day, my school organized a camp for the whole school. When I got to know about it, I was so happy because I am in the same team with him. Little did I know that this was the starting point of my sadness......
It was a 2 day 1 night camp. So, we all have to bring our own camp needs. As usual, he picked me up from my house that day. I was quite excited because I get to spend the night with him( Actually, it is that the same team gets a room to them self, but girls and boys sleep separately). That day, I followed him wherever he went. That was the happiest day in my life, so far. That night, he sneaked to my bed just to talk to me. I felt like the most fortunate girl in the world that night, because I got to talk to /see him for the whole night.
Second day, we were all required to run around the school with our sport leaders. Not so lucky, I sprained my ankle. Well you might think that I have gone nuts because I actually felt happy that I sprained my ankle. He helped me the whole way back home. That's why I am happy. But he told me something that really broke my heart.
He told me:" You know F from *** class?"
I said:"Ya, why? She is my best friend."
" How do you find her?"he asked.
" Well, she is very beautiful and she is very kind. A lot of guy is going after her. Why are you asking my so much about her?"
His reply really hurt my heart. " I am going after her!! She is very good towards me. I want to try my best to grab her heart!" After hearing what he said, I almost burst into tears. After what he told me, I kept quiet throughout the whole journey.
Since that day, I became very quiet. I don't really speak to my friends. Sometimes during recess, I will sit at a corner and stare in to space. I feared seeing him, I don't know what to do when I see him. So, since that day, I never look for him again.
One day, F came to talk to me. She told me about him. She told me about the time that she spent with him. She went to a lot of places with him, places that I never went with him. She even told me that every morning, he will pick her up. She also told me that he waited for her after school, like what he used to do to me. No wonder, I never see him in front of my house gate every morning, in front of the school gate every since the camp. He has been with her all along. The last thing she told me before she left really breaks my heart into pieces. " I am going to agree to be his girlfriend. I have confidence that I will love him FOREVER!" she said.
Now, every night, I will sit on my bed, thinking of the time I have been with him. I really wish that I told him about my feelings towards him. If I have done that, I won't have to be so heart broken now......
Readers: If you have any questions, feel free to e-mail me. My email address is: firstname.lastname@example.org. I can even tell you about updates about me and him. Whether I have started to talk to him or not, or even my feelings towards him now.
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CommentsPost a Comment
13 Apr, 2010 07:14 AM
Really sad story. Never thought a guy would hurt a girl so deeply. If that was MY boy, I will never think about him anymore!
15 Apr, 2010 06:08 AM
Alice:Thank you. I am feeling a little better now. I saw a lot of votes.
Readers: If you don't like my story, you can post a comment. However, please don't be too harsh. I am still not in a very good mood to read bad comments. Thank you.
16 Apr, 2010 12:13 AM
I am feeling so sad now. That guy is too over. How can he not realize that the person who loves him truly is you?!? Now that you don't talk to him anymore, I am really sad for you.
21 Aug, 2010 06:45 PM
it really make me almost cry
31 Aug, 2010 06:36 PM
i am a guy but i still cried when i read this.nWish u all the best in yr future love life.
14 Sep, 2010 09:00 AM
in evry case this happens dear,,,,,,,,,,,.its very painful when in our best friend"s ife their lover takes our place
23 Sep, 2010 11:15 AM
that really reminds me of how my bst frnd stopped talkin 2 me wen he got a girl frnd.just bcz she had some grudge against me, he stopped talking n it made 2 semesters of my collg life hell.i stopped talkin 2 others n alwz go on starin into book or d walls.It was really tough tym 4 me
30 Sep, 2010 10:16 AM
Alice Cal said "Really sad story. Never thought a guy would hurt a girl so deeply. If that was MY boy, I will never think about him anymore!"+#
ya lol because he cant read minds, idiot
next time u liek a boy tell him, do it the adult way, god this faggotry makes me angry
"booohooo boy doesnt like me, im not the centre of the world, afk watching twilight"
04 Oct, 2010 06:45 PM
Ok...ok One big BIG Question! They have reeces in ur high school sweet!
09 Oct, 2010 07:37 AM
16 Oct, 2010 12:15 AM
To everybody that commented here:
Thanks a lot. Thanks for yr support
@ScaredJoshua66 Ya i know, isn't it great???????
05 Nov, 2010 01:09 AM
everything happens for a reason dear.
life goes on.
08 Oct, 2011 09:23 PM
OMGGGGGG!!!!!!!! TELL HIM! NOW! TELL HIM! WHO CARES IF HE DATES HER! MY EX LIKES A DIFFERENT GIRL BUT I TOLD HIM I LOVE HIM MORE THAN SHE CAN EVER LOVE HIM!!! AND IM HOPING THAT HE WOULD SEE THAT IM THE ONE FOR HIM AND COME BACK TO ME<333 TRY TO DO THE SAME FOR ME PLEASE?!! <3 <3 <3 I wish you luck(:
08 Feb, 2012 02:11 AM
I was heart broken cuz a girl same name as yours ( thats how i find this page) rejected me i know that i am not smart not handsome
but i really love her with my heart
but after she left i was always looking at the sky daydreaming till one day i told my self i cannot be like this i must move on
but i really do love her :(
13 May, 2012 06:20 PM
it realy touching
13 Aug, 2012 11:03 AM
i was so touched by your story. I'm so sorry but you'll be okay.
29 Mar, 2013 07:22 PM
Ok i agree this is really a touching story.. But guys there's nothing to be so sad about.. Cuz it's just a story, not reality i guess!
14 May, 2013 07:15 AM
hey, i also relate in your story but first he likes me then, you know, what you heard from him that he liked F and, that. I'm sorry to hear that and it is nice to be also related.
14 May, 2013 07:19 AM
i really relate even if i'm young I want to be ur friend
12 Dec, 2013 07:42 PM
Hey im also a malaysian moved into singapore im currently sec 1 going into sec 2 nex year at st gabriel's sec if u ever wanna talk u can text me or something my no is 84581649
14 Dec, 2014 06:41 PM
are u alright now?? I know love is just a waste of time. or maybe for that time. He wasn't related to you. You would get a much better person than him. Best of luck!!
20 Dec, 2014 04:32 AM
Hi when i read this i had the same problem except i went to school with him an i told him my feelings its not always the best thing he asked me if we could be friends with benefits he said he doesn't want to mess up our friend ship trust me i think you did the right thing yes it hurts i know because this dude is my best friend and i didnt keep my feelings to myself so now i im a play toy to him... i feel what you felt or still feel.
07 Mar, 2015 02:55 AM
I would LOVE to know what happen yo you and him it. This story is amazing !! Thanks
14 Mar, 2015 08:03 AM
REALLY HEART TOUCHING
25 May, 2015 04:07 AM
hunni, you are a brave girl to do it, I understand what you are going through. i am also going through it as well.
15 Jul, 2015 01:46 PM
I feel very sorry for you, and i can feel myself in this story. Wish u the best of luck!
24 Jul, 2015 03:00 AM
Wow that's a really sad story
03 Aug, 2015 05:10 AM
story was not bad but you did'nt tried to express your love towards him true love never fails don't stay away from him be with him and shower your love on him...
13 Jan, 2016 02:31 AM
This is a story not about love but it's about my biological parents when I was about 2 years and old my parents were drug addicts and they would usually leave me home with my two other sisters one older one younger well the older one really took care of mikayla more because she was younger than me well later that day I was left outside on the front porch and we lived in a culdesac andi crawled out of my stroller and got hit by a car pulling into the culdesac and good thing the person got out and called 911 then my mom and dad came home high and asked what happened and just laughing walked away not giving a f*** in plain English later the next day they signed me and my sisters over to CP's but never said by and I am in a good home with two good adoptive parents and a good grandma I would give my life if I had to that's how good they are to me in the mean while I had to write this because ever since I found out it has bothered me and it's not that I don't love my adoptive parents but am curious about my past life and also sad and mad they didn't give a crap to turn their life around for their children
13 Oct, 2016 03:50 AM
I would love to talk to you please email me perlacarbajal2401 Gmail
13 Feb, 2017 08:23 AM
sad story really .....almost similar to mine ......sometimes making people the center of our happiness is really the cruelest thing we do to ourselves
20 May, 2017 08:30 AM
I pretty much don't know what to say but I sure know it ain't a pleasant thing to find out the one you have feelings for rather has feelings for some other person. I've been there before & as you rightly said, ended up bottling my pain & sadness but at least you did a great thing by putting out your story so as to help many of us including your beautiful self to get over the pain, so as to be able to love & love whole heartedly again.
All I'm trying to say is that at the end of the day people will judge you, misunderstand you and gossip about you, yet stay kind and committed to love. In the process of being honest & not chasing popularity, we are at times gonna be at odds with our own audience & they either will hate you or love you for being you & I believe all those who have said something over here love you for that bold step.
Being a modern relationship as compared to that of our folks is hard to define, but one can argue it is defined by struggles. Struggles against impossible beautiful standards. The struggle of either wanting or choosing not to & knowing that, no matter what you choose, an overwhelming majority is going to think you’re wrong.
But at the core of all that struggle, there is immense self recognision as to who you are & what you stand for. I would like to let you know that, there has never been a cloud that the sun couldn't shine through & when things get tough just remember that the airplane takes off against the wind, not with it.
Thank you Ya and yes, I would love to chit chat with you some more to get to know what happened after & also how you doing now. Thanks for all those who put out their hearts out over here.
11 Aug, 2017 02:03 AM
let him regret what he lost :)
06 Nov, 2017 03:21 PM
It really does when d one u lv secretly is mad for some one else