Vote -1

I Failed

ddangkochimp

27 May, 2013 02:28 AM

Hi there, call me simply ddangko,, well, just straight to the point that I've failed at my first job after 3 months probation. yes, I didn't pass that probation, and I'm always rejected whenever I apply job. All the interviewer I faced always look at me like,,"ah, you failed the probation"

I used to work at junior programmer at some digital agency. Sooner I've found that the workload was really out of my capacity,, I don't have a strong logic and problem solving ability that a programmer should (have been) have (had). Maybe when it comes to learn, I had lack of catching and convincing a brand new thing that came up to me simultaneously. In any scope of subject. So here now it hurts me a lot that I realized I only made my private tutor feed up,tired, irritated, bored,annoyed…this happened to all the tutor that has ever taught me privately, Because I learned really slowly, though I work so hard.

There , my manager, and all senior were often mad at me because I took really long time to understand case and solve it. they seemed like, "aaghh,ddangko!! you even didn't understand the basic logic!!" I remember when they put me in a small room, asked things I didn’t know, tried my weakness as a slow learner explosively,finally ignore me, Even if I tried my best,It was something that I couldn’t do about. The tears dropped on my keyboard, when the witness was only God, the error program, the laptop screen and touchpad. I asked people, the more I asked, the more I got confuse. the more they knew my weakness,a slow learner.

I didn't stop, I faced the problem no matter how hard the times were. Till after 3 months I held on, they said I couldn't continue to work there. I am very ashamed, I told a lie to everyone, I said I made my resign. and I really hurt when I hang out with my friends, especially my best friend. We talk about the things we’ve been done along the pass 2 years after graduation. Where she works, where I work, what she’s done so far..and She proudly tells where she works,achievement she got,project she’s done,prospective client she met,good meeting place to go,good position..Me, on the other hand. That failure seems to ruin everything in me. My working spirit feels blocked.

what should I do? I think hard work still can't redeem anything for me as a slow learner.

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rova lova says:
26 Sep, 2013 01:07 PM

I think the first job also hard like that, dont give up! You will find your better job, and found your self.

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Kate says:
28 Nov, 2013 12:59 PM

Some people judge by outward look and not by what is inside of you. They think they know you but they dont. Wait, did you study anything related to conputer in college? Well, maybe thats not your destiny. I think you should try something else out dats not related to computer. U might excel in it. Dont let anybody pull u down. You have a great future and destiny ahead of u. Forget the past and move on. Pray to God for direction. Goodluck with life bro

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Lavender Lavvy says:
09 Dec, 2013 02:15 PM

Believe in your heart and trust what it says. No matter how long it takes you, keep trying. Or maybe you could start a career as an actor, or maybe an artist, whatever is your hobby, maybe you could be a diving specialist! But you have to keep trying, and start over and get back up when you have no succeeded because one day, you will achieve that goal, and then you will be so proud. You know you have worked hard, and followed your heart. Others have taken short times, but you have put your heart and soul into it. Keep trying and don't give up on yourself. Do something that you enjoy, and try to expand it. Maybe photography, and create your own photography studio, or maybe writing books and start small with a novel. Anything from scratch, or from a previous start. Continue along the flow, and someday, and trust me, you will find it. Just don't let anyone or anything bring you down. When you don't succeed, get back up, and try again. Always try. Life is full of opportunities and take them as you go. Stay well, stay strong. I know this is quite late, but that's what I have for you. Never, and I mean never, ever, ever, EVER give up.

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