I just never thought...
Akee
24 Oct, 2011 09:00 PM
Today is October 25, 2011.
55 days ago, I said "Yes, I'll be your girlfriend." to this guy whom I loved so much with all my heart.
Well, I had my heart broken with other guys before I met him, but when I fell for him, I was not afraid to take a chance again and faithfully hold on to the idea that everything will be alright. He somehow made my days so much brighter and for a month, everything went smoothly. Communication was there. Although we're not able to see each other everyday, we still send text messages to each other or sometimes talk to each other over the phone. And when we get the chance to see each other, every moment was the best. Full of sweetness and happiness and all that loving stuff. I loved him so dearly, and I can feel he does too. In short, everything was going great.
But after the first month, things start to fell apart. He can now resist up to two days without texting or calling me. Sometimes, he won't answer my text messages or calls. I would just be simply ignored, but still, I tried to understand and considered the fact that maybe, "He was busy."
So days past, he hardly had time for me. He seldom texts me or calls me. Setting meet-ups became so hard as he always say he has things to do. But then again, I patiently understood.
A couple weeks after, we were able to see each other. And you won't even imagine the look in my eyes when I finally got to see him. I was so happy at that time, that I can't take my eyes off of him. Although the sad part is when I look at him, somewhere deep down, I can feel something has changed with him. I can feel this cold unusual feeling I never had from him before. But I just shrugged it off thinking that maybe he's just not into the mood or whatever.
But then, I was starting to notice something different between the two of us. I'm starting to think he's not into anymore but I just hated that thought so I never let that idea cross my mind anymore. Until one day, we had a fight.
I was so hoping that we can spend our second month celebration together but he said he can't be with me at that time. So I lost all the patience there is and furiously asked what is going on.
At first, he said it was about time and priorities. But I never believed that. I can feel that there's still something. So I asked him what else.
Then it struck me when he said, "I feel I don't love you anymore and that we should not be together."
The scenario 55 days ago and all the sweetness and the love there is suddenly flashed into my mind, and my mind kept on asking "Why??" "How did this happened??". But sadly, I wasn't able to get any answers from him. So I just asked, simply asked, "Should I be letting you go now?" I know it's a stupid question, but I was thinking that if he would say "No, we'll work it out" (which is like 25 out of 100% chance by the way) I would agree and still work it out. Because honestly, that's how much I truly love him. I sacrificed lots of things before, and I'm willing to do it again.
I wish I could say this was one of those breakup-makeup stories we sometimes read about, but it's not.
When I asked if everything was over between the two of us, at first he can't answer. He kept on saying "I don't know". But later on, he just said, "Yes maybe, this is over. It's over between the two of us."
It was the most heart-breaking moment of my life. I don't even want to recall how I cried that night, and the nights after that.
I had lots of questions going through my mind, but unfortunately, no one's gonna answer them anymore. I wanted him back but there's nothing I can do. I'm really not sure if I'll ever love this way again in the future, but I hope I will.
Love is still the sweetest feeling there is, but you just have to make sure both of you feels it...at the right time..and the right place..
Maybe we're not meant to be. Or maybe not now. Maybe I did something wrong, or maybe it's just him. Who knows? But one thing I'm sure of, is that I have to be strong and learn from this. So that the next time I fall in love..hopefully it would last.
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Comments
Post a Comment30 Apr, 2012 08:36 AM
Omg! I broke down when I read this. The same thing is happening between me and my bf. Though we have yet to break up, and our 5 month is coming up. I am so afriad of losing him, and Idk why. It's like I already have..
01 May, 2012 02:27 AM
Hope you did not sleep with him. If you did, he was probably using. Its sad but it's true that these things can happen.
03 May, 2012 04:14 PM
I'm sorry that you went therough this and I'm sorry that it's not the first time, but one day you will find the right person for you and all the heartbreaks before him won't even matter anymore.
04 May, 2012 11:06 PM
Yea that it get past it if you make it u'll get stronger so no worry yet the pain will.I don't know why but for some reason i can real late.so no worry k you'lln get though this.k
06 May, 2012 11:05 PM
i cant even explain to you how this exactly went along with something that happened with me the only difference is that i had to go through the same process 6 times with the same exact guy, but just like you, every time, i literally collapsed to the floor and simply couldnt bare the thought that everything i sacrificed was gone, this helped me a lot by realizing that i wasnt alone. Thank You.
10 May, 2012 02:21 PM
Your story reminded me of mine, the same thng happened to me and i never admire 2 be in love
12 May, 2012 04:34 AM
I admire yor boldness to face love again even it broke you oftenly.Thats life and love.Full of crying.Dying.Suffering.sacrificing.But me im afraid to fall in love again.I mean wa cant control our feeling but for me if ever i fall inlove again.I will kill myself.Bcause i do believe that love doesnt exitx forever.It will hurt me again and again.So i wont let that happen again.Best lck for u..
16 May, 2012 08:39 AM
i had fall in love once in my life with sonali but she left me alone and after that i always advice to everyone that never fall in love with anybody.
16 May, 2012 05:11 PM
There's hope for better out there everythings not lost so do the best to keep yourself busy and try to make a new change which you can gain sucess and make the best out of life and yeah charity is one big deed ;) so you can try that helping others is a good thing and can help you focus on the big issues and also make you feel better within
Your choice,
Even trying to do something big like career wise is good I wish u the best .. Smile ur beautiful
18 May, 2012 07:47 AM
.....AHHHM...THAT IS REALLY HARD ON OUR PART.....BREAKING UP WITH SOMEBODY WITHOUT KNOWING THE REASON WHY....IT REALLY HURTS.....SO BADLY..
19 May, 2012 07:25 AM
thats soo sad......... i really cried.love sucks, doesn't it???
22 May, 2012 03:59 AM
It is realy sad. Love start with fear and ends with tears.
22 May, 2012 06:55 PM
if you sleep with him.. god.. he's just using you. painful, when he broke up with you on the peak where you love him the most. you know what, sometimes, we only think that we need thosse things because we dont or we cant have it. but its not that tragic, in the end, you'll wake up that you dont need him at all.
24 May, 2012 09:38 AM
i've got the same situation as you. He suddenly want a breakup when we were serious with each other.i don't even know why he wants a breakup. I really did love him. But he says that he love another. I mean, why would he gave me fake hope from the beginning and suddenly go away like poof. a smoke -,- its been 5 months but i still in love with him .
26 May, 2012 10:17 AM
Mine story is also lyk the same be4 brkup, mine is now still going on, nd hope so that it will. wondefull thing about our relatnshp is that i proposed him nd starting lyk we are classmates nd daily sit next to each other nd thn i feel lyk top of the world. he tatooed his name on his right hand nd 4m that i come to know his name its DINESH , he is my soulmate, my everything . we met first in when we are in 10 class, from 2 years i lyk him but never dare to tell him. i feel very comfortable when i talk to any boy but when he comes in front of me i just not able to say anything to him and when he goes away i get angry on myself that why i didnt talk 2 him but always think that next ty
i will do, but the results are same. we meet on fb nd chat daily but in skull we never talk, amezing. one day he asked me to have my no nd ofcourse i gave him. he msg me first nd that was the ausome feeling, after 15 days of chattng on phone i told him my feelings 4 him and he didnt believe on me that i love him reason was may be that 4 girls cheated on him. and now we are in a relationship 4m last 3 months. but now we are suffering 4m misunderstanding and i hope it will clear soon.
plzz pray 4 me that me nd my love DINESH always be together nd 4ever.....
i luv u my babu so much there is no place 4 misunderstading between us
24 Jun, 2012 06:21 PM
its sad but I love my baby a lot I don't know what to do help m
e guys
Plz help me
04 Jul, 2012 12:36 PM
..wow..! amazing.. i hope u can love again better than what u did..
its not too late.. i also experience break-up and honestly, its really
HARD to move on..
--- It's hard to forget someone who gave you so much to remember ----
02 Sep, 2012 04:58 AM
I've got the same situation, my bf suddenly changed.. He's not like the person I've loved for the past 14months.. :'( I love him and I dont want to lose him
21 Sep, 2012 03:08 PM
awwww... thisz be a sad story btt hopee everythinq will go ok wit yuhh..! ! !
25 Sep, 2012 06:53 AM
I have the same problem...except, I was replaced by another guy... and I don't know what I did wrong...we were happy together..
Anyway, I'm sorry this happened to you. I hope you'll find someone who really cares about you :(
31 Aug, 2013 07:27 AM
Breaking up someone with no reason..how foolish. I hope there someone relly care and love you with all his heart
P.S:If he truly love you, he should sacrifice something for you (no offense)
01 Sep, 2013 08:53 AM
everybody goes thru same sufferin bt u shud ve da ability to endure it...true lov s really rare...
23 Mar, 2014 12:47 PM
heartbreaking :-(