Vote +2

Falling out of love..

natalie

09 May, 2012 07:57 AM

Hi, my name is natalie. you can call me Nat. Here is my story.

August 22, 2010. Me and my classmate went to our school gym. There were some festivities coming up in our town. Our school always joins. So a few of my classmates joined the school dance troupe. I for one was not in any way joining. I don't like dancing, I never did, and I never will. Anyway, as we went to the gym my friend asked me "Hey nat, ever thought of falling in love?" I smiled and simply said "No, I don't believe in love".
When we reached the school gym it was packed with students watching the troupe rehearsing. Some were just standing, some were sitting on the bleachers. We wanted to talk to our classmates after the rehearsal. So we sat on the bleachers and waited. The dancers changed their positions, the music changed and suddenly the dancers were standing on a basket doing well.. the chicken dance. Me and my friend Ally laughed our asses off. But then I suddenly stopped laughing. Someone caught my eyes, He was wearing a black shirt and white shorts. He was smiling and laughing, it looked like he had no care in the world. I don't usually use pick up lines but damn. At that moment I could really say that something was wrong with my eyes, it seems that I can't take my eyes off of him. He was tall, strong, every inch of his body was perfection. His face was like an angel. and no I'm not exaggerating. He really was the guy you'd call perfect. After the dance was over we went to where our classmates sat. I couldn't focus on our little chitchat. I kept eyeing the guy I saw. I don't usually tell my friends who my crushes are but I couldn't help it. I cut in to their conversation "Hey, who's the guy wearing the black shirt and white shorts?" I asked. "Mason. why? you have a crush on him don't you?" Ty teased, I asked "why? is it obvious?". "Yeah, pretty much all the girls here have an instantaneous crush on him". Great I thought now I have so many competition.

Later that night, I still kept thinking of him. I asked why? why can't I get him out of my head no matter how many times I distract my self he's still on my mind. The next morning, Ally realized that something was bugging me. She asked "Hey honey, you okay?" "No. Al, remember the guy who was wearing black yesterday at the gym? His name is Mason. I need to ask you a favor". I asked her if she could do a little research on Mason. And so she did. The next time I saw her she was in the school cafeteria, "Al! where have you been?!?!" I tried to hide my anxiety but failed. " I was doing research just like you asked. His name is Mason, he transferred from *beep* to here. Oh, you better take me to a movie tonight cause I got the good stuff!" She said. " What good stuff?" I asked.. Then she said "His number. you should call him." I was like. THANK YOU LORD FOR GIVING ME ALLY!! but at the same time I'm like, are you nuts? I can't call him just yet?!?! That's a bit stalker-ish plus, he doesn't even know I exist.

(Let's skip a few parts) One day out of the blue, he called. Our conversation went like this:

Mason: Hi! uhmm is this Nat?
Me: (pretending like I didn't know who called) Uhmm yeah. who is this?
Mason: Mason, from bio?
Me: Oh! hey. What's up?
Mason: Nothing much, thought I should give you a call.
Me: Oh, that was nice.
Mason: Yeah, so uhmm listen nat. I was wondering, there's gonna be a concert this coming saturday and I bought two tickets and I thought.. you know you might want to come.
Me: (Holds scream) Uhhh.. this saturday?
Mason: Yeah.
Me: Sure I'd love to. Pick me up at 8.

I screamed my ass off after that. I mean who wouldn't?? The guy of you're dreams, asking you out on a date.

I was waiting for the clock to strike at 8. I tried out soooo many causual out fits. But ended up wearing skinny jeans and the bands t-shirt. The doorbell rang and my mom answered the door. My mom cried out (well not literally) "Nat, Mason's here" as I went down I said goodbye to my mom. Mason opened the door for me. As we drove, I realized we were going the other way. I asked "Hey, are we lost?". "There has been a change of plans. We'll still see the concert but later.". We went to a park outside of town. He led me too a playground.

Me: Why are we here?
Mason: Because, if we went to the concert this early you'd never hear what I have to say plus I'd never have the guts to say what I really wanna say... Oh great now I'm stuttering.
Me: Okey, then what is it?
Mason: Nat, I know you've only known me for how many months. But I need you too trust and believe everything I'm about to say.
Me: Okey....
Mason: A few months ago you may feel as if I don't know you. As if you don't know I exist. I'm sorry for that. But the truth is, I have known you for years. The first time I saw you, you were on a stage play in your school. Me and my mom watched. I had a crush on you ever since. My dad got promoted so he enrolled me in your school, uhhhh I guess what I'm saying is that... I think I'm in love with you. I now this is all so sudden to you I'm sorry. Every time I look at you, I just light up. Whenever I see you looking at me I always ask my self. Is she thinking of me? I-----
Me: Mason, shut up. Hahaha I love you too. The first time I saw you you were doing the chicken dance which I find quite amusing. I don't really believe in love, especially love at first site. But I told my self before, that if ever I do fall in love. I'll make sure that I'll give my heart to the man who made me believe in love at first sight. And guess what.. It's you.

After that night we started dating. I loved him I really do. Everyone could tell that we were both in love. But our relationship wasn't perfect. There were fight, tears, and many obstacles along the way. Heck, there were even times that i wanted to throw a brick at him. But I always come to realization that he's everything I want in life. I don't wanna fall for someone else. I can never find someone who'd be willing to wait for me. Someone who's first and last love is me. When I'm at the point where I'm about to throw that brick. The love I have for him reigns, so I put down that brick and try my hardest to understand him and to fix everything.

As of right now we have been dating two whole years. I left for college. I'm currently 167,749 miles away from him. We call each other everyday, Text, skype. We do everything to keep this relationship working, I know I love him but the more that I'm away, the more I realize, I am slowly falling out of love.. There is this empty void inside my heart that he can't even refill. Ever since I left I felt this, even when we see each other I feel as if he is still not there. I love him, but not like before. At some point I want to end things with him, but the other part of me, the high school-crazy-in-love version of me don't want to break up with him. I'm being torn apart by my-self. I love him but the feeling inside me is confusing. It's like my heart won't talk, I'm breaking. what should I do. Stay in a relationship that I am no longer happy, or leave and carry this heartache and do what I can to move one?

Vote +2
Next Story >>

Comments

Post a Comment
profile pic
Brit says:
14 Nov, 2012 02:26 AM

It's normal to lose that sparks.. infatuation only last for so long. Now I think you will always love him, but maybe you need to move on and date other people. It's not fair to him if you keep stringing him along while you entertain breaking with him. If you want to date other people, if the fights were to unhealthy, if you have different values, then confront that, be an adult and don't string him along. But I also think he has a right to know how you feel and why. I think there is something to be said about commitment, loyalty, and faithfulness. Maybe you are growing apart, but then maybe you just need a little time. Be honest with yourself. You didn't go into what was wrong, but I'm assuming it's either really bad, or just not significant. Be open , be honest with your needs, and be nice about it.

profile pic
elle says:
14 Nov, 2012 05:15 AM

omg T_T thats was awesome love story..i think u better keep the relationship bcoz it is hard or should i say its really hard to found someone who can waits u for years and love u..if he can waits u for years n endures ur long distance love , why u cant

profile pic
Sruti Mishra says:
14 Nov, 2012 10:38 AM

Hey Nat ! Wasss Up !
Hw r u duing ?
Well,, I'm Also Going thru Same Phase.. 2 years Of relatnship..
nt knwing whethr to go back or move forwrd ?
:(

profile pic
dove says:
14 Nov, 2012 10:59 PM

i would surely say,talk with your bf about it & make things work out coz if ur bf really luvs you then it would be ur loss if he ever leaves you coz of your own self.TRUE LOVE IS SOOOOOO HARD TO FIND, DON'T LOOSE IT LIKE THIS

profile pic
nirmala choudhary says:
15 Nov, 2012 02:02 PM

so sad...one but you had lot of gudes that not to leave him even i am in the same position but you had dating n all buti didnt its fine......its so hard to forget him

profile pic
patz says:
16 Nov, 2012 02:31 AM

dont be sad everything will turn out just fine. just do wat your heart says..

profile pic
Delilah says:
19 Nov, 2012 01:32 AM

When you have a break you have to go and see him. If you still feel the same as you did before college stay with him, its only you missing him. If you don't tell him and work it out. That's all I got to say.

profile pic
Amol gaikwad says:
19 Nov, 2012 03:16 AM

TRUE LOVE IS
SO HARD 2 FIND, DON'T
LOOSE IT LIKE THIS......Becoz my love nt live she is no more
& I'm life alone
alonenss always with me

profile pic
yakub idris says:
23 Nov, 2012 01:57 PM

You shuldnt leave him.. Cuz its rili hard 2 start over wit sum1 else..

profile pic
Kelly Olaye says:
29 Nov, 2012 04:12 PM

If u luv some1 n some1 luvs u back,i dont tink u re lucky but i tink u re blesed. if u leave him u wont find some1 as enduring,lovin n comited as him.u miss him,i mean his presence wit u.make chance, spend it 2geda.u only feel tru luv once in a life!

profile pic
Ashlyn O'Herron says:
11 Feb, 2013 06:13 PM

just stay, you'll be happier that way even if you dont think so because you may regret leaving him in the end.

profile pic
I'm sorry says:
30 Apr, 2013 05:47 AM

I love you Ashlyn Susan O'Herron.

profile pic
anonymous says:
30 Apr, 2013 06:21 AM

Stay...... I miss my little cupcake

profile pic
lyn says:
30 Oct, 2013 04:32 PM

better let him know as early as it is... because if he truly loves you, you'll ruin his future coz he'll keep dreaming a future with you.... he is expecting you in his journey and imagine how painful to him and how its horrible when he find out he is dreaming alone all along...it'll will takes time before he pick himself up again and worse he'll no longer believe in love and play for the next girls...

profile pic
lupe says:
14 Jul, 2014 04:49 AM

The best things you can do in my opinion you have your own. Its harder cause your in that situation but he loves you the same. He desrves to be loved the same way and you dont. He desreves to khow and find someone who will. Is a waste of time if you stay with him while you dont love him. You will eventually be so unhappy and you desreve to find someone you really love. Sometimes we think we found the right person because we love them but when ups and downs come and we have to be apart from our love ones thats when you really khow if its right. Me and my husben have had hard times before even getting married we broke up like 2 times and some how we always come back to eachother we would always be intimate with eachother we didnt want nobody else even just thinking about it felt wierd. We are married now we have had to be away from eachother 2 times more acouple months but never fall out of love if anything when we are away we get closer we misa eachother so much. It remainds us how lucky and fortunate to have what we have. When is ment to be nothing will break that. When you love someone you do what is right for that person even if it hurts like in your situation. Its always your desition. And what feels right to you.

Your Comment

Do not post other site's link, it will be considered as spam