When Sadness Reaches Critical07 Dec, 2011 04:28 PM
We started talking when he moved to our school. He was so sweet to her, they texted for hours and hours, everything was going good. She had told her friends about their love for each other, about how great everything was going.
One day he came up to her. "Okay, I really like this girl, and I can't stop thinking about her," the girls heart started to pound and her palms started to sweat. All she could think was, 'this is me.'
"Go on," she said, her cheeks hot.
"And well, I want to be her boyfriend," he smiled.
"She's so beautiful. I really like her.."
"Who is it?!"
"Renee, could you give me her number?"
"Oh. Um, sure. I'll text it to you later."
The girl ran to the bathroom and started to cry. Renee, her best friend had stolen him away. How could this happen. She stared at herself in the mirror. What was so bad? She stared into her own dark eyes, thinking, "What's wrong with me?"
The boy started to text her afterwards, saying, so how about that number? She didn't respond. She just lye there in a ball sobbing. She glanced up and saw her reflection staring back at her. She realized her problem.
"It's because I'm too fat."
Her hands shaking, her body cold and pale, she opened the door and walked into the bathroom. She went up to the sink, and saw but another reflection of herself. She wanted this done.
She picked up her toothbrush, and shoved it as far down her throat as she could.
She started to gag, her eyes watering. But she kept going, I think we know what happened next..
Within the next week, she had lost some weight, but she got no attention. She couldn't take this any longer. As she got home, she ran to her bedroom and tried to cut herself with scissors. She was crying and screaming. Nothing happened.
"WHY GOD? WHY DID YOU HAVE TO DO THIS TO ME?" she screamed in between sobs. "Why..."
She suddenly stopped crying. She calmly walked to her desk, and grabbed a pencil.
Her heart racing, she started to write.
"I'm really sorry. I can't do it anymore. I try and I try but nothing works. I'm so sad. I can't do anything without messing up or causing pain or trouble. Nothing is working at all. I can't live my life and I can barely remember the last time I was genuinely happy. I put on a smile but is it real? No. It never is."
She read through the note, and signed it with her name.
Tears, dotted throughout the page. Violently shaking, she folds up the note, and lays it on the desk. She walks to her closet, very slowly.
She thinks, one last time.
She goes into the closet, and finds a scarf. She ties it into a loop, and attaches it to the clothing rod.
She turns purple as the life starts to rush out of her. She knows she can't scream, she doesn't have the energy..
"Love isn't a game. You can't play with my heart without somebody getting hurt."