An Indian Girl's marriage07 Jan, 2015 08:30 AM
There are no words to express the vain that one feels when the person you love and had made promises of marriage with, is marrying someone else out of the blue and you keep wondering what went wrong, what did I miss and how can I change the situation. But its not like the movies where you approach a girl's father tell him that you will do anything for her and he gives her hand to you. In real world, one has to watch her getting married to that someone else and feel each moment of doing so like a bunch of needles striking your heart.
Well this is a sad sad story of my brother who was so cheerful, so jovial, a high spirited man suddenly became mute like a bird who has lost its wings and couldn't fly again. It started like all love stories where a boy sees a girl and feels something tingling in his heart and just couldn't stop staring at her. Girl exchanges glimses with the boy wondering "why is he staring at me"? but even she couldn't stop herself from staring him after regular abeyance because definitely she is attracted to him. But this is where my brother named Vijay's story is so different and special. Well for your information seducing a girl in India is not that easy as in movies or may be america or UK because in India we the boys cannot just approach a girl out of the blue. Girls are really scared species here and if you try to be that smart confident guy who walks up to a girl asking for her number showing he has big balls, then she might just shout at you or cry for help or as a matter of fact just slap you, yeah there is a slight possibility that you might get it right depending upon your good looks and the openness of the girl but believe me 90% of the boys who tried to do so got their balls smothered or kicked by the audience in India. So the safest way to seduce a shy, conservative and "Im so afraid" kinda girl (which almost every Indian girl is) in India is to get her cell number from somewhere and text her but that too takes a lot of skill coz the moment you message her and she asks "Sorry? Do i know you?, how did u get my number?, and I dont talk to strangers!!" and she blocks you then game over. See how difficult it is to seduce a girl in India woof but its not actually that difficult when the girl likes you too. So all in all the girl has the power! If she likes you then its possible if she doesnt then forget about it.
Back to my brother 'Vijay'. He used to wait outside her college. He would get up early morning by 7 am, get ready and go the girl's college and wait outside the gate just to see her going in an then come back by 4 pm when her classes dismissed to see her again. This continued for weeks and she she would give him glimses and sometimes smile at him which made him crazy and boosted his confidence. After 2 months of stalking her by her college, Vijay finally got the balls to talk to her and get her number. After that it was cakewalk. He seduced her and they both fell madly in love with each other. She would wait by 1 am everynight for her family to sleep then call him and they talked all night, yeah coz she was very afraid of her family. Being from a Sikh religion, the girl's father was very strict and aggressive, It was only his decisions in the house and no one dared to raise questions against his actions. No not all family in India is like this but her's was!! She was afraid of her father like a mouse from snake. Anyways she managed to hide her relationship with Vijay as a secret and they continued talking over the phone all night and sometimes flunk classes to go around distant places in the city and make love. This continued for 3 years and I was just shocked because it was the longest relationship my brother had actually been in so I was sure that they are madly in love with each other.
Now here comes the twist in the story. The girl had graduated from her college and it was time for her to get married and raise children according to her father. Yep no job after graduation !! Since we are not from the Sikh community so there was no chance for my brother!! The girl knew that her father would never allow an inter caste marriage and that too a love marriage. She thought that her father would kill her if he got to know about her relationship with Vijay so she never dared to tell anything to her family. Whereas my family is a cool one and my brother told us everything about his relationship with her and we were happy to meet the girl. Even after endless hours of talking over the phone and in person, they couldnt come up with a plan as to how to marry each other. The only possible solution was to run away with each other but in doing so it would really spill a lot of dirt to both the families goodname and if they ever got caught in doing so, the girl was sure that her father would kill them both for doing so!! It is one of the biggest reason for honor killing in rural and rustic areas of India.
Vijay finally convinced her to talk to her family about their relationship as they would never know what might happen. Its better to try and then fail rather not fighting with the fear of failure. She could just get enough strenght to tell her mother. Her mother on listening to her became very angry and scared herself. She advised her daughter to forget about the boy and go on with the marriage with a boy his father chooses for her beacuse if her father discovers about her relationship then he would kill them both. I felt like killing her father then and even now as I right this story. What kinda man gives no place the feelings and likings of the ladies in the house.
Days went by like this and she got a proposal from a rich Sikh family to which his father agreed without even asking her daughter. This news really shattered both their hopes and dreams. The couple continued talking over the phone making plans that would not work and most of their talks would end up in a fight. Then Vijay convinced our Mother to go forth to the girls house asking for her hand for him as to give it a last shot before the doomsday for him. Our mother being the best mom did went to the girls father and asked for her hand but she was denied and disrespected not to my surprise as he had already agreed to someone else and we are not ths 'Sikh'. But the part that my mother was disrespected enraged my spirit and I felt like shooting her dad like a ranger giving it a headshot.
Days went by like this and they decided to break their relationship as its best for them to forget each other. I wonder how can you forget someone after 3 years of intense pure love relationship. So it happened, they broke off and deleted each others number, the girl as a matter of fact changed her number!! But god knows what went through my brother. He would speak to no one, eat nothing, say nothing , just be by himself looking at the stars and the moon and cursing them as to make his fate so miserable. Then he started some tobacco addictions and made his life even more miserable. He would often listen to him vomitting in the toilet late nights. Finally the doomsday came and the woman that Vijay loved got married to someone else. I wonder how tough would it be for her too as she was also as much in love with Vijay as was he but Im sorry don't know her side of the story. All I know is that my cheerful and spirited brother became as mute as a stone!!