A reason for life13 Nov, 2014 12:50 PM
"I like you... please go out with me"
I didn't want any of this. Why does my Childhood friend "like" me. We are childhood friends. I can never love him like that. I'll hurt him. I haven't told him yet. I haven't got time.....I'm dying, Alex. Please stop.
"STOP IT!...I DIDNT WANT ANY OF THIS! no...please" I ran as far as I could. Further, Further, Slower and slower. While tears kept streaming down my face, i came to a stop. "I love you Alex but i just can't...I"
"Clare! what are you doing!" My Mum was running towards me. I looked down, seeing the ocean beneath my feet. "what?" I was standing right at the tip of a cliff.
"Don't move!" My mum grabbed me with all her might. Darkness started conquering my eyes.
It's now the third day after Alex said those terrifying words to me. We only avoided each other at school, pretending nothing ever happened. Three months left.
Each day passed so quickly, i barely noticed him. Until it was finally the last day. I met him outside the hallway, all alone ready to leave.
i started feeling dizzy. Everything became dimmer. When the dimness almost swept away my entire face I saw him walking towards me. I wanted to run away. To scream. But I couldn't...he kept on coming closer
I was already conquered by this dimness. This loneliness, sadness, shame and disappointment.
I dropped to the ground. Through this darkness I still saw his face. I took another last peek in the past. When we were perfect.
"beep..beep...beep" Huh? where am I? wait..... who am i?
I saw a boy talking furiously with a doctor. Who is he? He looked toward me and started running at me.
"Clare! are you alright! Clare is anything hurting!?"
The doctor stopped him.
"It's no use. She cannot remember anything. Im sorry"
"no it can't be.....Clare do you remember me. Please tell me"-
"who are you?" a quick and perfect response blurted out of my mouth. It seems my name is Clare. Clare? What a dull name.
Two other people started running towards me. They pushed the boy out of the way. And the woman started talking to me.
"Clare darling! ... it's okay.. you're having amnesia right now...it will go away soon. Clare"-
Another nurse came in and dragged her out. I was left in here with a man and a younger boy. The man was talking furiously to the doctor while the boy started sobbing on the floor. What's going on. Oh god help me.
After a few hours I started learning about myself and learned that those grown ups were my parents.That boy was Alex. Although the doctor already told Alex to tell me the past he just refused. He looked at me.
"You're past is not worth remembering. I'm sorry Clare"
2 Years Later
I am a high school girl, 17 years old called Clare. Although I don't like that name I have to go with it. In the current past I had amnesia. I don't remember anything at all. All I know is that I was supposed to die of cancer and not instead have amnesia.
I fell in love with a boy called Alex. He was with me in the hospital so I recon he must be someone important. I suddenly fell in love with him and today is the day I am going to tell him. I stopped him outside the school's hallway. I was confident enough.
"Alex....I like you... please go out with me"
I noticed that he was watching me with great fear. His face stated growing pale. I knew this was the end, he wouldn't accept me.
"Clare...I loved you. Before you're amnesia and even now.. Please stay with me, Clare. I accept all of you."
I was happy. Very happy. I gave a gentle smile and then suddenly fell to the ground, smashing my head.
I heard a soft voice echo through my brain. I noticed immediately that I was in the hospital again.
"Clare are you all right? Clare can you see me? Do you know who I am?" AS I saw Alex worried about me, tears started streaming down my face without even blinking. My memories came back, all of them.
"Alex.....oh no,...i'm sorry..I didn't notice your feeling before my amnesia and"-
He cut me off and pulled me into his arms.
"It's okay Clare...It's okay..I love you. I love you"
I felt some tears dripping on my shirt. Alex's tears.
"Why are you crying......-"
oh god. I felt dizzy again. In the background I saw the doctor looking at me pitifully. I lifted my chin up to Alex's and looked into his eyes, still feeling dizzy.
"Alex...is this the end..?"
He squeezed me tighter
"I love you Clare....more than anything..remember that I always love you"
He said these beautiful words with a shaking voice. I knew it was my end.
It was over.
Thank you god for giving me another chance in life. Another hope to start everything over and making it the best out of it. Now i can finally sleep peacefully. With no regrets. With a smile on my face.